In Memory Of....

Today I ventured to a website I haven't been to for a while www.helpher.org which is a site to support women with Hyperemesis Graviderum in pregnancy (which is what I had).  I opened the page and below is what I saw.  I immediately was sobbing uncontrollably.  I can't help but post this in memory of my lost baby.  I feel such mixed emotions knowing that there are so many others who had to abort babies they wanted to so badly. I know that many of these women who lost their babies to hyperemesis have gone the surrogacy route.   I....and we....are so grateful for surrogates who help ease our pain....just a little bit. 

In Loving Memory...

We dedicate the First Annual HG World Awareness Day to the babies and moms lost to HG. The HER Foundation will not stop fighting for these babies and their mothers until an answer of why HG happens and what can be done. At the same time we want to recognize our HG sufferers who are currently enduring HG, we want you to know you are not alone and we are fighting for you and your unborn children. For those who have endured HG in the past, our fight is for you as well.

Luke

07/25/08

Our angel in heaven.

Samuel Alexander Peterson

12/23/2006

Samuel 12/23/2006

Casey Lee

February 3, 2006

Sometimes we do not win the fight against HG. My heart aches for you.

Baby

15 may 2007

In memory of our precious baby boy. 15 May 2007

Brooke

12 October 2010

You will always be in our hearts my little Angel xx

Josephine Bethany Baker

11/02/2003

In memory of my daughter who went to be with the angels on 11/02/2003

Twinks

09/24/08

I love you and I'm sorry I couldn't fight hard enough.

Luke & Mira (twins)

March 17, 2010

HG stole my twins and all my dreams away from me. I will never forget.

Brendan Christopher

May 22, 2009

HG may have taken you away from me, but it will not take away my love for you

Baby

10/21/1992

Forever gone, Never forgotten - Angel sent to Heaven due to undiagnosed HG

little angel

october 12 2010

love you little angel xox

TANA KAMACAJ

oct.2009

please, forgive me...

Hope

May 25, 2004

Missing you always, sweet little one.

Scarlett Juliet

10/13/10

I'm sorry, I was scared. I Love you and you were so dearly wanted.

My Sweet Baby

6/15/1999

I am so sorry, I was weak and scared..I wish I could have held on

Gabriel Tad

12/04/09

We will always love you and never forget you our precious baby.

Baby Rozeboom

July 2010

xoxoxo

Baby Angel Cole

04/30/2007

It takes a second to say I Love You but a life time to show it. xxoo

Clyde Stevenson Gomez Jr.

9-11-08

To our little Angel. We miss you and love you R.I.P

*Angel*

13th September 2008

I never held you in my arms but i will hold you in my heart forever xx

Day babies

08-2008 and 06-2010

I think of you two everyday, I hope I will get to hold you in Heaven.

Baby Moore

March 2003

Forever in our hearts

persephone

17 sept 2010

i love you lost to HG & deep depression your message 'go gently' x

Un named

17/09/07

You will always be my angel. Each day you are in my thoughts.

nataya rutherford

4-8-2008

Im sorry i couldnt fight harder for you baby,forever in my heart.

Ayden Rae Pack

6-12-2007

Mommy & Daddy Love U & miss you! In your name we will help find cure!

Fushiko

Feb. 2008

My little phoenix, I'm sorry I could not walk through fire for you.

Little One

02/04/2009

I'm sorry I couldn't fight harder, forgive me, love you always x

bbies 2 & 4 & my twins

7/06, 10/09, 10/10

my heartaches for the each of you we love you

Baby M

November 12, 2010

You were the gift I didn't know I wanted, and wish I could have kept

Amos

2 Aug 210

Found in heaven, waiting for us to come home. We love & miss you xxx

Angel Who Holds A Piece of My Heart

October 1995

Please forgive my weakness. I think about and mourn you everyday.

Gabriel

September 13, 2002

My precious Gabriel, I am so sorry I wasn't stronger for you.

My baby

February 28th 2006

I wish I could have known you. Please, forgive me.

our wee angel

December 4th 2010

we never got the chance to meet you but will always love you x x x

baby

may 8 2009

you are in our hearts and a part of our souls forever.

Gavin Joseph

10/24/2010

The shooting star in my life, you lit up my world & were gone too soon

hope

02/07/2010

to our precious baby. sorry i wasnt strong enough x never forgotten

Baby Sarah

12/8/2010

I wish my body was strong enough. We will always love you!

Indi

01/03/2007

Goodnight sweetheart. xox

Pregnancy #1, #2, #3, #4 & #6

Our special "What-If" Babies. We'd take HG again if we could keep you.

Baby

23/11/2006

Please forgive me.

MATEO BARRIOS

JULY 2008

You will always be in our hearts.Love Daddy,Mommy,Destiny,and Stephany

Baby

30.December 2010

You were loved little one. Forgive me.

Baby M

December 22, 2010

You were loved and will always be a part of me

My Sweet Darling

Dec 20, 2005

Words cannot express my sorrow....

Muskaan

12/23/2010

I'm so sorry. I could not protect you. Please forgive me.

Daniel

05/25/2011

We love you and miss you baby Daniel!

My LiL Jelly Bean

January 3, 2011

Im sorry I wasnt stronger & didnt fight harder I think of u every nite

Laura & Abby

26 & 31 October 2002

I will see you again in Heaven

Taylor Layne

3-3-04

In loving memory of Taylor Layne, "Gone but not forgotten." 3-3-04

dreams

05/03/2007

my precious twins I lost the fight but will always meet u in my dreams

baby

2000

i'm sorry please forgive me

Little One

October 2008

You were loved and wanted. HG stole you and my hopes and dreams.

Noah P

01/05/2010

i always think of you and how you would look, i cry myself to sleep

Melynda Scarlett Ryan

4/25/11

Just know you were loved little one..till we meet again

Baby O

09/05/2008

I think about you often and who you would have been. R.I.P. <3

Baby

Nov.2006

You will always be in my heart.oxoxoxox

LOVE

May 7, 2011

Please forgive me, I will always love you.

5/4/2011

meet you in heaven!!! Love you

Sophia Rose

4/1/2009

Your are in my heart forever, I think about you every moment.

Bella

21/3/2011

I am sorry I gave up

"Sammi"

November 2004

Wish we had a chance to actually meet...One day we will....

Buggie

5/10/00

Be blessed my baby, your brothers needed me here... Love you forever

Little Angel

March 17, 2011

Please forgive me, I'm sorry I wasn't stronger. Love Mom.

Our twins

1st August 2011

I'm sorry I couldn't keep going for you. Forever in our hearts. xxx

Baby

20/07/2009

I love you. My heart will never be the same again.

my three Angels

2009,10,11

My darling babies. I wanted you more than anything...

Tyler James Durbin-Mibeck

7/8/09

So sorry I didn't get you out in time! 32 weeks

Simone Rose

feb 2005

Even thought I was so ill throughout, I will always have love for you.

Baby twin

10/23/1997

Im sorry I was not strong enough for you to here in our lifes,

Baby

8/2000, 7/2002, 4/2005

I am sorry that I was not strong enough to keep you all. RIP!

Vincent Charles

2/11/10

lost at 20 weeks still thought of every day.

Unamed

August 30,2011

I'm sorry I could not hold you both. We love and miss you dearly!

Lisa

17-10-2011

Never in my arms, always in my heart. You should be here, forgive me.

Joshua Keown Patin

07/10/2009

To our baby boy...We Love and Miss You!!

little blessing

11-20-2011

I'm so sorry, I love you. I hope to see you one day

Valerie Lim

01 June 2011

I am so sorry that I could not protect you. Forgive me. I've Failed.

Angel Baby

10-4-11

Roses are red, violets are blue sugar is sweet but not as sweet as you

zoe bella reardon

may 8, 2009

you are in our hearts and a part of our souls, forever.

my angel

19.11.11

mummys so sorry i failed you my heart is broken

Grandson-Lil Gage

July, 7, 2011

Forever in our hearts!

Baby B

11/22/2011

Mommy is so sorry she was too sick to care for you. Miss you everyday.

Sprout

February 21, 2012

We love you Sprout. You will always be the baby of our dreams.

Baby Ray

10/08/2010

I wish we could have known you!

Hall Babys

2006-2007

For my 3 babies I lost to HG, I'm sorry that I couldn't fight harder

Our Butterfly Baby

2-22-09

"too beautiful for earth"

Sammy

11/2004

Missed but never forgotten

Little Bean

12.04.12

Named by your Big Sister Neve and Big Brother Alex, loved by us all. x

9 of you welcoming 1 more

1994 - 2012

Your sister Neve and Brother Alex want you all remembered together.XXX

Baby Twins

1997

In honor of our unborn Saints

Mitt Romney's Grandchildren

Yesterday Mitt Romney had 2 grandchildren born via surrogate.  I have to had the story to my blog since it is a high-profile LDS surrogacy.  Here is the story according to one article:

This the second time that Tagg, 42, and his wife, Jen,39,  have used a surrogate. The same surrogate was used for the twins carried their youngest son Jonathan, who was born in August of 2010. Their other three children were not born via surrogacy.

On Facebook, Tagg gave even more details about the birth, confirming that the twins are his biological children. “Jen and I are happy to announce the birth of twin boys, David Mitt and William Ryder,” he wrote. “Everyone is healthy and happy. They weighed in at 5 lbs 13 oz and 19-3/4 inches and 6 lbs. 13 oz and 19 inches. A special thanks to our gestational surrogate who made this possible for us. Life truly is a miracle, and we feel so blessed to be able to celebrate the arrival of these precious boys into our family. For those keeping score at home, these are grandchildren numbers 17 and 18 for my parents.”

According to the official handbook of the Church of Latter Day Saints, to which the Romney’s are members, surrogacy is not encouraged. “The Church strongly discourages surrogate motherhood,” the handbook reads.

A Romney aide, when asked about the church’s view on the procedure, said that Tagg had made the bishops at his church aware of his family’s plans.

My personal feelings on it? I'm excited to see another LDS family doing surrogacy.  We have no idea why they did it.  I'm going to assume they did it for reasons similar to mine since they already have children that they already gave birth to.   

When I read the article I wonder if there is going to be a huge increase in LDS people doing surrogacy now because of this high-profile case.  I'm glad that whoever wrote the article did their homework and accurately reported that it is discouraged by the church.  I would be afraid that everyone would think of it as an every-day good idea and go for it.

I consider myself very lucky.  I have a perfect surrogate.  We have a great friendship and relationship of trust.  Yes, we have a legal contract which tells us what we "must" do (and I'm glad we have our contract), but honestly, we don't follow it very strictly.  We have both been giving and taking as far as finances go to both mine and Vanessa's advantages at times.  We can do that because of our trusting relationship.  But even with girl who I'd chosen as my former surrogate, I know I never could have had that sort of relationship with her.  A surrogacy relationship like ours is truely one in a hundred million.  If I were to decide I wanted to have another child by surrogacy I would not even bother trying to find another surrogate.  I know I could never find anyone like Vanessa (now it would be different if a friend or family memeber wanted to volunteer-- then it could probably be as good).  Finding a complete stranger and making it work in such a smooth way is next to impossible.  I can see the potential problems that would arise and therefore I can see why the church would discourage it.  

I'm so happy for the Romney family.  And I'm so happy for my family!