Gratitude

In this month of Thanksgiving I couldn't have a more thankful heart.
I am so thankful to my Heavenly Father and also Vanessa for helping my dream come true.  Last night I went and kissed my 2 sleeping princesses.  I adore my children.  They are absolutely priceless.  Heavenly Father and Vanessa are giving me a priceless gift.  Yes, I'll be paying Vanessa, but you can't pay the price of the child.  I'm only paying her for her inconvenience and discomfort for being pregnant.
S and I have thus far paid a HUGE sum of money towards our many many attempts at this.  Lets just say we could have paid cash for a home here in Illinois with that $.  When I thought it had not worked I was really distraught at the idea of what we could have used that money for instead of loosing it all.  But now that this has worked, it was worth every penny and I have absolutely no regrets.  I'd pay it all again without hesitation.
I'm so grateful and excited. I'm having the hardest time waiting until December 2nd to find out how many we are having.  Based on the numbers thus far, there is an extremely good chance of multiples.  This is both exciting and scary since Vanessa isn't quite 5 feet tall (not much room inside!).
I've told just a few select people about our pregnancy.  I'm excited to announce it after the 2nd. I know I'll get some interesting reactions but at this point I couldn't care less about what people think.  I now allow myself to imagine going and watching our babies be delivered and bringing them home.  This is going to be the fastest pregnancy every (all of my 9-month pregnancies seemed to last about 5 years or so).

Lastly, Vanessa is about 5 weeks pregnant now.  I was thinking about that fact last night.  When I was pregnant with #3 I was 5 weeks pregnant at Christmas and me and my family had gone to Utah to Visit (from California).  We knew I'd most likely be hospitalized around 6 weeks since that is what had happened with my previous 2 pregnancies.  But by the 23rd (5 weeks) I was already getting sick so we celebrated Christmas on the 24th in the morning and I flew home and Steve and the kids drove the entire way (and mind you it was Steve's birthday).  Honestly, I was scared to death.  I knew what was coming and although we had planned it,  I was terrified. Christmas day I was only able to keep down the juice I sucked out of an orange and by the 26th I was in the hospital for dehydration.  Shortly thereafter my feeding tube went in.  3 weeks after that we lost our baby.   Vanessa is at the same point of pregnancy where I would be hospitalized.  I'm so grateful that I'm not going to be hospitalized and suffer beyond belief this time.  I cry as I write this.  I just can't express my gratitude.  It was horribly ironic that the only way to get what I want most (a baby) was through my horrific pregnancies.....until now.  How do you thank someone for a priceless gift and saving you from such suffering?  I have no idea.